The Friday Tipple: Dilbert’s Dilemma

Dilbert's Dilemma

Feeling downtrodden, dear Boozers? We understand. In a world where there are those who delight in stepping on the backs of others to achieve their petty goals, it’s hard to be the guy who just wants to quietly punch the clock and pick up a paycheck. Not everyone cares about movin’ on up, but try telling that to the eager beaver who just assigned you a 200-page analysis of the efficacy of traditional paper clips versus mini binder clips, in the hopes that it will bump them up in the estimation of some pencil-pushing muckety-muck who never heard of paying overtime.


All this means that you’re really going to need a drink when you get home from a weary day of banging your head softly against the wall of your cubicle. A classic drink of the workingman is the Boilermaker — essentially just a beer and a shot of whiskey, clearly designed to take the pain away before the factory whistle has even finished blowing at the end of the workday. We call our version Dilbert’s Dilemma, a slightly more subtle combination that can be savored as you slump gratefully in the La-Z-Boy in front of a flickering screen. Don’t let The Man get you down.

Dilbert’s Dilemma

While a beer syrup forms the basis of this cocktail — a simple combination of beer, sugar, and some spices — it’s the simple act of coating the interior glass with a small amount of orange liqueur that creates a new depth of flavor.

2 ounces of whiskey (or 3 if it’s been a rough week; we like Catoctin Creek Roundstone Rye)

1/2 ounce Beer Syrup (recipe here)

1/4 ounce orange liqueur (Don Ciccio & Figli Mandarinetto, Grand Marnier, or Triple Sec will work)

orange peel for garnish

Pour the whiskey and beer syrup into a cocktail shaker and stir briskly to combine. Pour the orange liqueur into the glass and swirl it all around the inside of the glass to coat completely. Add the blended whiskey and beer syrup to the glass and garnish with orange peel. Drink up.

The Friday Tipple: The Finish Line


It’s the dog days of summer, a time when you often see runners out in the hot sun, slogging along the dusty streets in sweaty shorts with a glazed expression. Those who run marathons and half-marathons are generally forced to do their toughest training during the summer and winter months, as most races tend to take place in fall and spring. So today’s Tipple was inspired by those who are seriously in need of a hydration libation, something to look forward to at the end of a long hot run. Or a swim meet, dance class, surf session, or just a hellish day at the office. We call it The Finish Line.

Based on a classic Mexican agua fresca, this cocktail is instantly refreshing, with or without alcohol, but we like to add some crisp vodka as an end-of-workout reward. Key to its preparation are ice cubes made from coconut water, which pack a healthy punch of electrolytes and potassium. We threw some antioxident-rich blueberries into the ice cube tray with the coconut water; some brands include Vita Coco and  Naked, which you can find in the water or juice aisle at the supermarket — but make sure to get coconut water not coconut milk.

The Finish Line

1.5 cups fresh watermelon, cubed

juice of one lime

1 teaspoon light agave nectar

3 fresh mint leaves

chilled vodka

4 coconut water cubes (or regular ice cubes if you prefer)

slice of cucumber for garnish (optional)

Put first four ingredients in a blender and purée thoroughly to make an agua fresca. Pour agua fresca into a cocktail shaker with a handful of regular ice cubes and a generous measure of vodka. Shake vigorously. Put coconut water cubes into a glass and strain the agua fresca mixture over them. Garnish with cucumber, kick back, and rest your aching muscles.